Season Four, Episode Twenty
"The Yoko Factor"
Note: Kali is going to creep her notes into the episode because she wants to be a creeper today.We start this episode off by learning about everything that is currently going wrong with the Initiative. Morale is low, everyone is having a sad about Professor Walsh, etc. And plus now Riley fell in with "a bad crowd" and left the commando life behind. The upper commando guys understand that he is with a Buffy Summers and say they don't have much information on her. The stupid head says she's "just a girl."
Cue Spike telling Adam how Buffy is "more than just a girl." He tells Adam how badass Buffy is. And then Adam says something that makes me nervous:
SPIKE: Just wanted you to know, when the Big Ugly goes down, Slayer's gonna be right in the thick of it. You ready for that?
ADAM: I'm counting on it.
Mr. Creepo is Creepy
Adam promises to restore Spike to the "savage" he once was once he gets Buffy where he wants her. Spike tells Adam how the scoobies are the piece of the puzzle that messes up their chances:
SPIKE: Easier said. She's crafty. She and her little friends.
ADAM: Friends…
SPIKE: Yeah. There's your… whatcha call it - variable. This slayer's got pals. You want her evening the odds in a scrape, you don't want her slayerettes mucking about.
ADAM: Take them away from her.
SPIKE: Yeah, that's a plan. She's working solo, she won't have a chance to come after us when the wild rumpus begins. Plus it'll make her miserable, and I never get tired of that.
Oh yeah. Leave them to me.
ADAM: You can't hurt them. What can you do to make sure they're out of the picture?
SPIKE: Not a blessed thing. They're gonna do it for me.
And now we know exactly where this episode is going. In order for Spike to succeed, he has to play at the scoobies biggest insecurities and get them to turn against each other. This goes back to how in Lovers Walk, Spike was able to see the reality about the Angel/Buffy relationship and how earlier this season he saw that Willow was in more pain than she was letting on when Oz left. Spike really has a gift for seeing into people and understanding them better than even their friends can.
Target One: Giles
-Used to be Buffy's Watcher and now is her grown up friend with an apartment they can use for Scooby meetings
Target Two: Willow
-Is vulnerable and concerned because she just came out to Buffy and she didn't handle it so amazingly at first
Target Three: Xander
-Besides his insane military knowledge from his two minute long soldier days, he really's got nothing to offer the gang besides his friendship
After this big reveal, we get to creepily watch Buffy sleep. You know something happened with Angel when we go back to watching Buffy sleep. *waves hi*
Next, Xander brings Riley some clothes while his laundry is getting washed. Looks like Xander suddenly became Riley's bitch; when did this happen?
They both talk about their distain for Angel:
XANDER: What did Buffy tell you?
RILEY: About Angel? Everything. More than I wanted to know, sometimes. She loved him. He turned evil. He killed people. She cured him. He left.
XANDER: "And they all lived happily ever after." Did she happen to mention what turned him evil?
RILEY: He was cursed. Some kind of gypsy thing. And then… I dunno. Hundred years passed or the moon hit a certain phase or…
XANDER: One moment's happiness.
RILEY: What about it?
XANDER: It's his trigger. Angel's an okay guy - so long as he's mopey and sad and brooding. But give him even one second of pure, real pleasure…
RILEY: And that sets him off.
XANDER: Only in a big old kill-your-friends kind of way. And you know what makes Angel happiest? Give you a hint: it's not crème brulee.
RILEY: Buffy. Sex. With Buffy
Looks like someone only gave Riley the spark notes version of her and Angel's sexy little romance.
And now, just in case you didn't get enough of sexy Giles singing, we get an encore performance in his living room. Giles singing "Free Bird" here is one of the sexiest things ever.
And just to make things more awesome, Spike walks in on him and the lulz begin. Spike makes himself a cup o' blood and begins telling Giles how he's looking for Buffy to give her some information about Initiative files. He asks for some compensation: "Year's supply of blood, guaranteed protection, merry bushels of cash and - most important - a guarantee that I'm not to be in any way slain." Thus proving that Giles has been spending too much time with Anya, he responds to Spike's list of requests by saying "done" but Spike ain't to quick to take his word for it:
SPIKE: With a smile and a nod from you? Sorry - not close to good enough. This deal's with the Slayer.
GILES: I'll tell her.
SPIKE: Oh, you'll tell her. Great comfort, that. What makes you think she'll listen to you?
GILES: Because.
SPIKE: Very convincing.
GILES: I am her Watcher.
SPIKE: Think you're neglecting the past tense there, Rupert. Besides, she barely listened when you were in charge. I've seen the way she treats you.
GILES: Yes? A-and how's that?
SPIKE: Very much like a retired librarian. Look. I've got what she wants - long as she has what I want. Pass the word. She knows where to find me.
GILES: I'll tell her.
SPIKE: Oh, you'll tell her. Great comfort, that. What makes you think she'll listen to you?
GILES: Because.
SPIKE: Very convincing.
GILES: I am her Watcher.
SPIKE: Think you're neglecting the past tense there, Rupert. Besides, she barely listened when you were in charge. I've seen the way she treats you.
GILES: Yes? A-and how's that?
SPIKE: Very much like a retired librarian. Look. I've got what she wants - long as she has what I want. Pass the word. She knows where to find me.
Target One: Giles
☑ Insecurity seed planted
Giles responds to this in the best way possible, by having himself some alcohol. Drunk Giles FTW.
Time for some adorable action! Willow and Tara are discussing the newest addition to their little family: Miss Kitty Fantastico!
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| I am surprised Sarah didn't put this picture up herself because of its adorableness. |
Besides the obvious kitty cuteness, they both spend the scene talking about important crap such as next semesters schedules and living situations for next year. And we see some more of Willow's insecurities without Spike even talking to her.
WILLOW: We haven't really talked about it. I used to just assume we'd be roomies through grad school and into little old ladyhood -- you know, cheating at Bingo together and forgetting to take our pills.
TARA: But…
WILLOW: But, I don't know. It hardly feels like we're roommates now. She's all busy with Riley, and I'm gone a lot too. And when we are there together, it's just Slayer business talk and feeding Amy the rat. I guess I should ask her…
TARA: But…
WILLOW: But, I don't know. It hardly feels like we're roommates now. She's all busy with Riley, and I'm gone a lot too. And when we are there together, it's just Slayer business talk and feeding Amy the rat. I guess I should ask her…
It looks like she's going to be pretty easy to sway...
Insecure Willow is Insanely Vulnerable to Mr. Chiphead's Evil Scheme
Xander gives Spike some clothes and Anya tells him that Xander "did Riley yesterday"
Anya will never stop being awesome and, damn, now I want In-N-Out... Me too!
Now Spike's attempt to make Xander feel more insecure is clever. Just like the show uses his military knowledge every chance they get, he's gonna use it too:
XANDER: Can I tell you how much I really don't care?
SIPKE: Attitude. We'll see how far that takes you at boot camp. Hey, s'pose you'll get a tough-as-nails drill sergeant who's only hard on the men 'cause he's trying to keep 'em alive when the bullets start flying? I love that stuff.
XANDER: Boot camp? Yeah, like I'd go there.
SPIKE: Oh, you changed your mind? Not gonna join?
Anya jumps up, goes to Xander. Smacks him on the arm.
ANYA: You're joining the army?!
XANDER: (to Anya) Okay, one: ow. Two. (to Spike) Where'd you get that idea? And three: (to Anya) Ow! I am not joining the army.
ANYA: Well, good. Stopped that nonsense just in time.
XANDER: I was never--(to Spike) Who told you this?
SPIKE: Your little girlie-mates were talking… something about being "all you can be" or "all you can be." Having a laugh… I figured you were signing up. Say, you got anything larger in the toy gun line?
XANDER: All I can… can you believe that? Like I'm some useless lunk. It happens that I'm good at lots of things! I help with all kinds of… stuff… I have… skills, and strategems, I'm very…(to Anya) Help me out.
ANYA: He's a viking in the sack.
SPIKE: T'rific.(examining clothes) You didn't have these cleaned after the last time, did you?
XANDER: This is so like them lately. It's all about them and the college life. You know what college is? It's high school without the actual going to class. Well, high school was sort of like that too but the point is, I'm the one working hard to earn a living and it's a huge joke to them. (mocking) "Xander got fired from Starbucks." "Xander got fired from the phone sex place…"
ANYA: They look down on you.
XANDER: And they hate you…
ANYA: But they don't look down on me.
SPIKE: It was just a laugh. Don't have to go insane over it.
XANDER: Is anybody talking to you?
SPIKE: Sir, no, Sir.
SIPKE: Attitude. We'll see how far that takes you at boot camp. Hey, s'pose you'll get a tough-as-nails drill sergeant who's only hard on the men 'cause he's trying to keep 'em alive when the bullets start flying? I love that stuff.
XANDER: Boot camp? Yeah, like I'd go there.
SPIKE: Oh, you changed your mind? Not gonna join?
Anya jumps up, goes to Xander. Smacks him on the arm.
ANYA: You're joining the army?!
XANDER: (to Anya) Okay, one: ow. Two. (to Spike) Where'd you get that idea? And three: (to Anya) Ow! I am not joining the army.
ANYA: Well, good. Stopped that nonsense just in time.
XANDER: I was never--(to Spike) Who told you this?
SPIKE: Your little girlie-mates were talking… something about being "all you can be" or "all you can be." Having a laugh… I figured you were signing up. Say, you got anything larger in the toy gun line?
XANDER: All I can… can you believe that? Like I'm some useless lunk. It happens that I'm good at lots of things! I help with all kinds of… stuff… I have… skills, and strategems, I'm very…(to Anya) Help me out.
ANYA: He's a viking in the sack.
SPIKE: T'rific.(examining clothes) You didn't have these cleaned after the last time, did you?
XANDER: This is so like them lately. It's all about them and the college life. You know what college is? It's high school without the actual going to class. Well, high school was sort of like that too but the point is, I'm the one working hard to earn a living and it's a huge joke to them. (mocking) "Xander got fired from Starbucks." "Xander got fired from the phone sex place…"
ANYA: They look down on you.
XANDER: And they hate you…
ANYA: But they don't look down on me.
SPIKE: It was just a laugh. Don't have to go insane over it.
XANDER: Is anybody talking to you?
SPIKE: Sir, no, Sir.
Target Two: Xander
☑ Insecurity seed planted
And this next scene is boring because I hate Forrest so here's what you need to know: Apparently, Buffy is the "first girlfriend Riley's had" [insert Riley/Forrest joke here] and Forrest is killed by Adam and nobody cares.
Congrats, Forrest. Out of everyone Joss has ever killed off, you are possibly the one that everyone cared least about. Or at least I cared least about. I cried for weeks over Forrest's death Sarah! Gosh. He was probably one of the best characters Joss ever came up- HA, ok, I can't keep a straight face anymore. No one cares about Forrest unless he's running.
Now back to people I do care about: Willow and Tara! Spike gives Willow some discs and she tries to break into them to get some information. Spike asks when he gets paid and Giles says that he'll get paid once Willow lets him know that they have some useful information. He looks over and sees his in:
WILLOW: Crack a government encryption code on my laptop? Easy as really difficult pie.
SPIKE: You're not exactly the whiz these days either. God, I'm never getting paid.
WILLOW: I am a whiz!
TARA: She is a whiz.
WILLOW: If ever a whiz there was… I just need some time.
SPIKE: No, I just heard you weren't… your mates said you weren't playing with computers so much. Into the new thing.
WILLOW: What new thing?
SPIKE: You know: you two, the whole… wicca thing.
WILLOW: They were talking about that?
SPIKE: Can we get back to business here? I got a deal at stake.
WILLOW: What'd they say?
SPIKE: Talking about, you know, it's a phase, you'll get over it.
WILLOW: What? Who said that?
TARA: Maybe we should focus on the gobbledygook…
WILLOW: Was it Buffy? (to Tara) 'Cause you know what she means by that…
SPIKE: She was defending you. 'Cause Xander said you were just being trendy.
WILLOW: Trendy?
SPIKE: I didn't see why they were going on. Person wants to be a witch, that's their business.
WILLOW: I knew Buffy was freaked.
TARA: You should talk to her, 'cause I'm sure…
SPIKE: Pressing business, ladies. Let's not get sidetracked. Still got your monsters to fight.
Target Three: Willow
☑ Insecurity seed planted
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| Look who's back, bitches! |
Next scene is fun. Angel comes back and who else besides Riley will be there to welcome him back to Sunnydale. I really hate whenever Buffy boyfriends and exes do this throughout the series; they claim her as their property. Why would you do this? Buffy can kick each and every one of your asses and still have enough energy to pun.
After Angel and Riley fight, Angel goes to see Buffy. I love what Buffy says to Angel about why he's there. "You thought of something else really hurtful to say and, well, you couldn't tell me on the phone because the funniest part is that look on my face--" Riley remains very sane and points a gun at Angel's head. Luckily Buffy's here to stop all of this stupidness: "I see any more displays of testosterone poisoning, I will personally put you both in the hospital. Anybody think I'm exaggerating?"
Angel asks to talk to Buffy but Riley says he's not leaving so Buffy responds accordingly. And leaves.
They go outside and discuss what just recently happened on Angel to confuse everyone who isn't watching that series and trick them into thinking Buffy is more connected to it than the show actually is. Angel has a few moments where watching the series helps you understand Buffy but they are very much two separate series. But Angel is good and, if you like Buffy, you should consider watching it.
Back to the point of this episode. Spike goes to Adam and tells him that he's accomplished his task and everything is set in place. And Adam tells him there is still one thing...
And then some funny shit happens when Riley thinks that the Angel he just met was Angelus. Maybe someone should let him watch season two of this show and let him understand how much the man he just met is not Angelus. After discussing Angel for a bit, Buffy lets Riley know that Forrest is dead. Poor girl, needing to relay this horrible message to him. And poor Riley, as if he doesn't already have enough going on.
The scoobies all reconvine once more at Giles' place and the buttons Spike pushed become very apparent:
BUFFY: Sorry everyone, but we're on a clock here. Adam was at that cave. Maybe he was there for a reason. I can go back, scope it out, track him if I have to…
WILLOW: Right! And maybe you'll get lucky and he'll still be there and he can rip your arms off for you! Buffy, you can't go back alone.
GILES: (cheerful smile) You never train with me anymore. Adam's gonna kick your ass.
BUFFY: Giles?!
GILES: Sorry! Didn't mean to be so honest. Terribly sorry.
XANDER: So she doesn't go alone. Giles, weapons all around--
BUFFY: You're not coming, Xander. You'd get hurt. It'll be easier for me if I'm not worrying about protecting you.
XANDER: Oh. Okay. You and Willow go do the superpower thing. I'll stay behind and putter around the batcave (indicates Giles) with crusty old Alfred here.
GILES: Ahh. I am no Alfred, sir. You forget - Alfred had a job.
BUFFY: Willow stays behind too. I'll do it alone.
WILLOW: Great. And then, when you've got your new no arms, we'll all say, gee, it's a good thing we weren't there getting in the way of that!
XANDER: Right, and maybe we can help in other ways. Need some fightin' pants, Buff? I could go get you some fightin' pants.
BUFFY: Guys, you're just making this harder.
WILLOW: Wow. We're already getting in the way. We're good at this, huh, Xander?
XANDER: Right. I'm so good at it you might have to ship me off to the army to get me out of the way.
BUFFY: The army?
XANDER: You didn't know I knew about that, did you? You two talking about me behind my back.
BUFFY: Us talking about you? How about you telling Riley every last detail of my life with Angel--
WILLOW: (to Buffy) Besides - when is there any "us two?" (to Xander/Buffy) You two are the two who are the two. I'm the other one.
XANDER: Uh-huh. But maybe that all changes when I'm doing sit-ups at Fort Dix.
GILES: Fort Dix. Heh heh…
BUFFY: (to Giles) Are you drunk?
GILES: (happily) Quite a bit, actually! Man, I freaking love drunk Giles.
BUFFY: Well, stop it.(to Willow and Xander) This is stupid.
XANDER: Stupid. So you finally have the guts to say it to my face…
BUFFY: I don't think you're stupid, Xander, so stop being an idiot and help me fix things. I need both of you. I need you all the time, just not now. Adam is dangerous--
WILLOW: Wait. How do you need me? Really.
BUFFY: I need you a lot. You're great, with, with the computer. Usually.
GILES: Right you are. And I'm great with the pacing and the saying of "hmmmmm" and "ahhhhh," and "Good Lord!"
BUFFY: And you got the witch-stuff… that's…
WILLOW: Witch stuff?! What do you mean by witch stuff?!
BUFFY: What is happening? This is crazy.
GILES: No it's not! It's all finally making perfect sense and I'm not going to miss a moment of it. *sits and falls over*
Now back to our fight:
XANDER: And if I did join the army I'd be great. You know why? Because maybe they'd give me a job that couldn't be done by any well- trained Border Collie.
GILES: That's it. I'm going to bed!
Giles heads for the stairs, unbuttoning his shirt as he goes.
WILLOW: Sure, you'd be wonderful in the army -- you think the umbilical cord between you and Anya would stretch that far?
XANDER: I knew it. I knew you hated her.
Giles' shirt sails over the banister and lands on Xander's head. Why can't they show Giles shirtless? WHY?!
WILLOW: Hey, I'm not the one being judgmental, here. I'll leave that territory to you and Buffy.
BUFFY: Judgmental? If I was any more open minded about the choices you two make my whole brain would fall out.
XANDER: Oh. And superior. Don't forget that. Just because you're better than us doesn't mean you can be all superior.
BUFFY: Guys, stop this. What happened to you today?
WILLOW: It's not today. Buffy, everything's been wrong for a while. Don't you see that? Even though Spike pitted everyone against each other, this statement is very true.
BUFFY: Willow, what do you mean things have been wrong? Things don't have to be wrong, do they?
WILLOW: Buffy, things haven't been right since Tara. We have to face it. You can't handle Tara being my girlfriend.
XANDER: No, it was bad before that. Since you two went off to college and forgot about me, just left me in the basement to --(suddenly, quietly) Tara's your girlfriend?
GILES (O.S.): Bloody hell!
BUFFY: Enough. All I know is that you want to help, right? Be part of the team?
WILLOW: I don't know anymore--
XANDER: Clearly not wanted--
BUFFY: No. You said you wanted to go. So let's go. All of us. We'll walk into that cave with you two attacking me and the funny drunk drooling on my shoes. Maybe that's the secret way to kill Adam.
XANDER: Buffy--
BUFFY: Is that it? Is that how you can help? You're not answering. Go on. How can you possibly help? So I guess I'm on my own. And you know what? I'm starting to get why there's no ancient prophecy about a Chosen One and her friends. <-- I love that line.
dun. dun. DUN.
WILLOW: Right! And maybe you'll get lucky and he'll still be there and he can rip your arms off for you! Buffy, you can't go back alone.
GILES: (cheerful smile) You never train with me anymore. Adam's gonna kick your ass.
BUFFY: Giles?!
GILES: Sorry! Didn't mean to be so honest. Terribly sorry.
XANDER: So she doesn't go alone. Giles, weapons all around--
BUFFY: You're not coming, Xander. You'd get hurt. It'll be easier for me if I'm not worrying about protecting you.
XANDER: Oh. Okay. You and Willow go do the superpower thing. I'll stay behind and putter around the batcave (indicates Giles) with crusty old Alfred here.
GILES: Ahh. I am no Alfred, sir. You forget - Alfred had a job.
BUFFY: Willow stays behind too. I'll do it alone.
WILLOW: Great. And then, when you've got your new no arms, we'll all say, gee, it's a good thing we weren't there getting in the way of that!
XANDER: Right, and maybe we can help in other ways. Need some fightin' pants, Buff? I could go get you some fightin' pants.
BUFFY: Guys, you're just making this harder.
WILLOW: Wow. We're already getting in the way. We're good at this, huh, Xander?
XANDER: Right. I'm so good at it you might have to ship me off to the army to get me out of the way.
BUFFY: The army?
XANDER: You didn't know I knew about that, did you? You two talking about me behind my back.
BUFFY: Us talking about you? How about you telling Riley every last detail of my life with Angel--
WILLOW: (to Buffy) Besides - when is there any "us two?" (to Xander/Buffy) You two are the two who are the two. I'm the other one.
XANDER: Uh-huh. But maybe that all changes when I'm doing sit-ups at Fort Dix.
GILES: Fort Dix. Heh heh…
BUFFY: (to Giles) Are you drunk?
GILES: (happily) Quite a bit, actually! Man, I freaking love drunk Giles.
BUFFY: Well, stop it.(to Willow and Xander) This is stupid.
XANDER: Stupid. So you finally have the guts to say it to my face…
BUFFY: I don't think you're stupid, Xander, so stop being an idiot and help me fix things. I need both of you. I need you all the time, just not now. Adam is dangerous--
WILLOW: Wait. How do you need me? Really.
BUFFY: I need you a lot. You're great, with, with the computer. Usually.
GILES: Right you are. And I'm great with the pacing and the saying of "hmmmmm" and "ahhhhh," and "Good Lord!"
BUFFY: And you got the witch-stuff… that's…
WILLOW: Witch stuff?! What do you mean by witch stuff?!
BUFFY: What is happening? This is crazy.
GILES: No it's not! It's all finally making perfect sense and I'm not going to miss a moment of it. *sits and falls over*
Side note: here's another reason why I love this show. Tara and Anya left the room so normally I'd be thinking about the awkwardness going on with them. However, this show is so amazing that they show us their awkwardness inside of Giles' bathroom
TARA: You think this'll go on awhile?
ANYA: Hard to say.
TARA: Nice bathroom.
ANYA: Like the tile.
ANYA: Hard to say.
TARA: Nice bathroom.
ANYA: Like the tile.
XANDER: And if I did join the army I'd be great. You know why? Because maybe they'd give me a job that couldn't be done by any well- trained Border Collie.
GILES: That's it. I'm going to bed!
Giles heads for the stairs, unbuttoning his shirt as he goes.
WILLOW: Sure, you'd be wonderful in the army -- you think the umbilical cord between you and Anya would stretch that far?
XANDER: I knew it. I knew you hated her.
Giles' shirt sails over the banister and lands on Xander's head. Why can't they show Giles shirtless? WHY?!
WILLOW: Hey, I'm not the one being judgmental, here. I'll leave that territory to you and Buffy.
BUFFY: Judgmental? If I was any more open minded about the choices you two make my whole brain would fall out.
XANDER: Oh. And superior. Don't forget that. Just because you're better than us doesn't mean you can be all superior.
BUFFY: Guys, stop this. What happened to you today?
WILLOW: It's not today. Buffy, everything's been wrong for a while. Don't you see that? Even though Spike pitted everyone against each other, this statement is very true.
BUFFY: Willow, what do you mean things have been wrong? Things don't have to be wrong, do they?
WILLOW: Buffy, things haven't been right since Tara. We have to face it. You can't handle Tara being my girlfriend.
XANDER: No, it was bad before that. Since you two went off to college and forgot about me, just left me in the basement to --(suddenly, quietly) Tara's your girlfriend?
GILES (O.S.): Bloody hell!
BUFFY: Enough. All I know is that you want to help, right? Be part of the team?
WILLOW: I don't know anymore--
XANDER: Clearly not wanted--
BUFFY: No. You said you wanted to go. So let's go. All of us. We'll walk into that cave with you two attacking me and the funny drunk drooling on my shoes. Maybe that's the secret way to kill Adam.
XANDER: Buffy--
BUFFY: Is that it? Is that how you can help? You're not answering. Go on. How can you possibly help? So I guess I'm on my own. And you know what? I'm starting to get why there's no ancient prophecy about a Chosen One and her friends. <-- I love that line.
☑ Mission Complete
Now would be the time where I would get all analytical and explain how all this happened, but that will all come out in tomorrow's episode so I'm just going to leave it as is.
And as if all of this fighting isn't bad enough, we end tonight's episode with Adam getting a vistor
-Sarah
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