Season 4, Episode 18

“Where the Wild Things Are”

We learn pretty much right off the bat what this episode is going to be about in the show’s teaser:

“You get fang. I’ll get horny.”

After killing a vampire and demon that are working together, Buffy and Riley immediately run to tell Giles about this strange occurrence since vampires and demons hate each other. Just kidding, they totally have sex. That will be happening a lot this episode.

On to our next couple talking awkwardly about sex- Anya and Xander! Anya feels like they are breaking up because they didn’t have sex last night. Is it just me or does anyone else feel a little queasy thinking about Anya and Xander having sex? To make the situation more awkward, they are having this conversation while Xander is working his new job.

“You want sex? Let's have sex. Right here, you and me, hot, sweaty, big sex!”

Mommy, why is the ice cream man yelling about sex?

 Anyways, the next day Buffy and Riley get out of bed long enough to tell Giles about the vampires and demons working together and the Scoobies put it all together to figure out that Adam is bringing all manner of evil creatures together. Then Riley and Buffy run off to have more sex.

Later that night, guess what’s happening? Yup, Buffy and Riley are at it again. They are going to get a UTI if they keep it up like this, I’m just saying. During their moment of passion, the rest of the house drops several degrees in temperature and you know what that means-

There be ghosts up in here.

While taking a lonely stroll, Spike sneaks up on Anya trying to scare her into giving him money. They go inside the Bronze for a drink and this is the first time we see these two bonding over all of their woes. They talk about their past relationships and the fun times they had when they were really evil and eviscerated people. Oh those were the days.

Back at Lowell house, Buffy and Riley are eye-fucking each other from across the room. 

Get a room you two. Oh… they do.

Crazy shit starts going down at the party. To start off with, some guy discovers the walls G-Spot. Everyone starts touching the wall because it feels good. Weird. Next, Tara freaks out over Willow touching her. This makes Sarah have a sad I bet.

Anya brings Spike to the party to make Xander jealous. Oh Anya, it doesn’t surprise me that you continue this pattern. Xander and Anya continue arguing over the fact that they “have nothing in common aside from both liking your penis” until they go separate ways in order to enjoy the party.

On the Weird-Shit-O-Meter we are now at a 6 since some chick attacks Xander to kiss him while playing spin the bottle and then she decides to go “all Felicity” and chop her hair off. Willow tries to find Tara, but instead finds a ghost boy drowning in the bathtub. Xander, Willow, and Tara try to get to Buffy for her help but she’s… um… otherwise occupied.

Vines cover the door to Riley’s room and the house starts shaking. All of the guests are able to escape along with the Scooby gang, but Xander wants to go back in to save Buffy. He asks who wants to help, and of course the first to volunteer is Spike. Wait- what?

I know I'm not first choice for heroics - and Buffy's tried to kill me more than once - and I don't fancy a single one of you all – but… Actually, that all sounds pretty convincing… Think Asian House is still open?

The Scooby gang isn’t able to get back into so they go searching for Giles at The Espresso Pump and discover this:

I love everyone’s reactions.

 Xander is completely freaked out and all the girls, even the gay ones are turned on. I’m with the girls, Giles is a freaking sexy acoustic rock god right here. After his set, they research Lowell House and discover that it used to be a home for teenagers- runaways, juvenile delinquents, and emotionally disturbed teens. So they go to visit the woman that used to run it who happens to be a crazy bitch.

MRS. HOLT: My kids didn't think I knew, but I did.
GILES: (starting to understand) Very, uh, perceptive of you.
MRS. HOLT: Without me they would have been shut out of the kingdom. Lost to lust.
GILES: But you ... helped them.
MRS. HOLT: The girls felt the vanity more than the boys. I'd see them preening like Jezebel. Doting over their pretty hair.
XANDER: So you'd hack it off.
MRS. HOLT: I'd remove the temptation to admire themselves. (Giles removes his glasses) They were better for it.
ANYA: What about the bathtub? Something happened there.
MRS. HOLT: I performed baptisms on the most unclean. Those who were tainted with impure thought and deed.
GILES: You held them under?
MRS. HOLT: They needed to be reborn. (Rises) You choose to pass judgment on me?
GILES: (Rises) Well, someone ought to! You traumatized and, (she waves her hand dismissively) and abused these children, children who, who have no doubt become extremely disturbed adults! (She starts to walk away; he pursues her) You have ruined lives, Mrs. Holt. Furthermore, what you did has now manifested itself as a, a malevolent presence which threatens still more lives! You have a great deal to answer for.
MRS. HOLT: I refuse to listen to this when I can smell the sin on each and every one of you. (Points to them all)
XANDER: Yeah? You smell sin? Well let me tell you something, lady, she who smelt it dealt it!
(Giles looks at him.)
XANDER: It's like what you said, but faster.

So apparently because of Buffy and Riley’s around the clock screwing, they set off the pent up energy to manifest poltergeists. Good job you lust-filled freaks. Willow, Tara, and Giles perform a séance to “release” the spirits pent up sexual energy. Anyone else feel like they are about to give some poltergeists an orgasm? While this is going on, Xander and Anya get over their issues in order to chop through the ivy that is blocking the way to Buffy and Riley. The poltergeists continue to attack them, but they fight their way to the door and are able to bring Buffy and Riley out of their sex-crazed moment and save the day.

Xander, don’t you knock?

Screw you guys. Yeah, bite me.

The next day they in the cafeteria they discuss the horrors of the night before.

RILEY: I can't believe it really happened.

BUFFY: I just had no idea. It's so creepy! (Looks up at the others) He was really singing?
(Willow nods.)
XANDER: I'd say it was more like crooning. (To Anya) If we grow old together, remind me to skip the midlife crisis. (Puts his hand on her knee.)
ANYA: (smiling, softly) Okay. (They look affectionately at each other.)
WILLOW: Come on, you have to admit, it was kinda sexy.
XANDER: Please stop saying that. I'm willing to offer cash incentives.

The moral of the story is moderation. You shouldn’t repress your sexual urges or else ghosts will try to kill you. But you also shouldn’t screw like rabbits because ghosts will still try to kill you.

-Kali!

Sarah's Notes
I hate when Kali's posts are so epicly hilarious that it makes whatever I could add useless. However, this won't stop me from posting a cute picture of Willow and Tara!

And, yes Kali, Tara freaking out does cause me to have a sad, but I also find it hilarious. As Kali explained, Peeves is in the house because some crazy religious nut job tried to "save" them all from becoming lusty horndogs. However, through everything going on in this house, this causes Tara to feel "disgusting" and guilty. I'd just like to point out to here how everyone is basically sexing up every warm body that they come into contact with and Willow, who has been building a relationship with Tara over the past few months, gets this reaction from TOUCHING HER LEG. This makes me giggle because I believe it clearly shows how the conservative religious right act so stupidly about homosexuality. Out of everything they could have done, Willow and Tara doing this, makes them look like pure little kittens in comparision to everyone else at the party yet they get the same type of negative response. I don't think it can be anymore plainly stated that Willow and Tara having a loving relationship that is in no way dirty, wrong, or sinful but instead loving, caring, and delicate.