Season 3, Episode 8

“Lovers Walk”

In this episode, SPIKE COMES BACK AND KALI DOES HER HAPPY DANCE! Before that however, we start with Willow complaining about her SAT score. I understand her here because when I got my 1440 all I could think was “What am I an idiot? I should have gotten at least a 1500!” Then Cordelia again annoys me by saying how she “hides” the fact that she’s smart. To paraphrase John Green- The Venn diagram of “Guys that don’t like smart girls” and “Guys you don’t want to date” is a circle.

Then, in a near perfect recreation of how he first entered Sunnydale, SPIKE RETURNS! Well, except this time he’s drunk. He has a sad about Drusilla leaving him. Don’t worry sweetie, I’ll comfort you.

Now we are made to realize just how horrible being a cheater-mc-cheaty-face is. Cordelia now has pictures of AX in her locker and Oz gives Willow a Pez holder witch.

Willow: I don't have anything to give you.

Oz: Yeah, you do.

Feel shame AX and Willow, feel shame. Oh! Let’s make up for our guilt by going on a double date because that in no possible way could go wrong.

Giles is packing for some Watchers retreat (shouldn’t you, ya know, be watching your Slayers?) and Buffy is talking to him about her SAT scores.

Buffy: Oh yeah. She saw these scores, her head spun around and exploded.

Giles: I've been on this Hellmouth for too long. That was metaphorical, yes?

Both Giles and Joyce are now pressuring Buffy to go away to college and leave her Slayer duties to Faith. Ok first of all, from what we know about Buffy, she barely has a C average. Just because she scored high on the SATs doesn't mean IVY league schools are going to be beating down her door. Second, it’s implied that Buffy doesn’t want to leave because of Angel, but she has a lot of other things here too, including her friends. Angel even tells her to go to college.

Side note: The book Angel is seen reading is La Nausée by Jean-Paul Sartre; its main theme is the nature of existential angst. I didn’t think Angel would need to study that since he’s already got it down pretty well. I think ALL CAPS HARRY POTTER should borrow it though.

Plus, everyone has been going on and on about her “destiny”, now you tell her to go away! I feel like Giles is getting too close to Buffy and is now thinking of her more as his daughter instead his Slayer. So how about lets all just let Buffy decide what she wants to do?

Back to Spike since he is the only thing that matters. Having passed out drunk in Angel’s garden the night before (tee-hee, that sounds dirty), he is awoken to the sun burning his hand. Poor guy. Spike has spent his entire life and now after-life being in love with women. Now on his own, we see how well he’s doing.

Even though this scene really doesn’t fit in the episode to me, I love the Mayor discussing Spike. Especially when he talks about how he’s a “loose cannon” and we don’t want him to “rock the boat”. “Is that a mixed metaphor… cannons were on boats…and a loose on would rock it…” LOL.

So, now things are getting a little intense. Spike goes to a magic shop in order to find something to curse Angel with, since he blames him for Drusilla leaving him. Willow goes to the same magic shop in order to buy ingredients for a de-lusting spell. This is the beginning of Willow automatically turning to magic to solve human problems and make her own life easier; as her powers grow stronger, so does her impulse to use magic as a catchall problem solver and to manipulate human emotions.

Ok, Willow/Xander rant time. I’m slightly annoyed that everything is implying that they are just “lusting” after each other. They are best friends that are now physically attracted to each other…um… sounds like a bit more than lust to me. I just don’t get why they think this is such a bad thing. Yeah, the timing is crappy, but Willow has had feelings for AX forever and I think AX has liked Willow too, but is now just realizing it. I just feel like this whole thing is lazy, sloppy writing. There SHOULD be more between these two. They DO have real feelings for each other. Instead, at the end of this episode when they are discovered, both just go their separate ways when they could actually just be together now. THEN, their relationship and feelings are barely ever addressed again. Like I said, I just feel like there should have been more to them or a better explanation of their break-up, but I’m just left feeling like the writers did a poor job. </rant>

Ok, Willow is doing this “de-lusting” spell on AX without his knowledge or permission, so I’m gonna agree with him there when he gets upset with Willow for doing so. Edward Cullen Willow, we don’t do things to other people without their permission. Spike interrupts in order to kidnap Willow and force her to perform a love spell on Dru to get her back. It sounds as if Spike cheated on Dru with Buffy by forming a pact.

Spike: I said it didn't mean anything, I was thinking of her the whole time; she didn't care.

They ran to Brazil, and Drusilla made out with a chaos demon to get back at Spike. It’s adorable how Spike tells Willow all about his problems and she comforts him.

Spike: God, I'm so unhappy

Willow: There, there.

Willow tells Spike that she needs more supplies and a book. Spike goes over to Buffy’s house and we think that he is going to threaten Joyce, but instead she makes him hot chocolate and he cries on her shoulder. I love it so much!

Angel walks by and sees what’s going on, but having been uninvited cannot get into the house. Joyce still doesn’t know that Angel is back with his soul intact, so she immediately believes him to be out to harm her. Spike mocks Angel and OMG is that funny.

Buffy returns, invites Angel in, threatens Spike, and Joyce stands there extremely confused. Spike lets her know what has happened with Willow and AX, so they head off to get the ingredients for the love spell. Although Buffy correctly guesses, "He's probably just got them locked up in the factory" ...NO... I.... no....

While looking for spell ingredients, Spike has a great talk with Angel and Buffy. He may not be very bright, but he sure knows what love is. Favorite Line: “You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood -- blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.”



My new favorite Trio.



My new favorite trio gets into a fight with Spike’s old minions. Afterwards, Spike has a change of heart and decides: “Oh, sod the spell. Your friends are at the factory. You know, I'm really glad I came here. I've been all wrong-headed about this. I'm gonna do what I shoulda done in the first place. I'm gonna find Dru, wherever she is, tie her up, torture her, until she likes me again...Love's a funny thing.”

 

Back at the factory, Willow and AX start kissing since they believe they are about to die. Oz uses his magical werewolf sniffing powers and smells Willow in the factory. Cordelia and Oz walk in on them making out. Then Cordelia is impaled. Joss has a way of ruining everything. How many times have I wanted Cordelia killed? But now I just feel bad because she just had her Grinch-sized heart broken.

We then cut to a funeral, making us think that Cordelia died. Nope, she’s just in the hospital. WAY TO GET MY HOPES UP, JOSS. Willow tells Buffy how bad she feels, Cordelia tells AX to GTFO, and Buffy tells Angel she can’t be around him because “I can fool Giles, and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or Spike for some reason.”

Now everyone is alone and has a sad. BUT we finish on a high note with Spike. Spike, referred to as the Sid Vicious of vampires, leaves town singing the Sex Pistols version of “My Way”. That scene rocks so hard.

-Kali!

Sarah's Notes: Lolz Edition

-Willow freaking out over her SAT scores makes me giggle

-Oz's sarcastic voice lol

-"BUFFY, YOU KICKED ASS!" lol

-Cordelia "now you can leave and never come back" lol

-Xander sees pictures of himself in Cordelia's locker. Awww

-Oz gives Willow a pez witch, but what's the occasion? "Pretty much you are" Awwwww.

-Re: Joyce's head exploding "I've been on the hellmouth too long, that was metaphorically?" Giles lol

-Willow being turned on by shoe renting lol

-She didn't even care enough to cut off my head or set me on fire" Spike lol (Favorite Line)

-Joyce and Spike's relationship makes me laugh so freaking much!

-"You got any of those little marshmellows?" Spike lol

-"You're a very bad man!" Spike lol

-Joyce is so confused lol

-Oz can smell Willow which, I agree with Cordelia, is disturbing

-Buffy and Spike are hilarious and Angel stops Buffy from staking Spike because he loves him

-"You'll fight and you'll shag but you'll never be friends." Ummm, season 6 anyone?

-And since Joss created this show, Oz and Cordelia come to save AX and Willow just as they start making out

-Vampire kabob!

lol

-Spike is going to find Dru and tie her up and torture her until she likes him again lol

-Cordelia is hurt. I has a sad :(

-aaaaand Buffy and Willow walk past a funeral talking about Cordelia's recovery because Joss is awesome and makes us want to kill ourselves thinking a character died (though that might have made Kali really happy thinking Cordelia died.)

-AX comes and brings Cordelia some flowers and she tells him to stay away from her

-Buffy goes and tells Angel she's not coming back because she can't fool herself or Spike and they aren't friends and what she wants from him she can never have.

-And once again in true Joss fashion no one is happy at the end of the episode. Except for Spike, of course