Season 5, Episode 4

"Out of My Mind"



I have to say, I'm glad to see Buffy back in a cemetery more. We open on her trying to stalk and slay a vampire, but Riley shows up to stake him for her. Don't worry, there's another one. Oh wait, Spike tries to take care of that one. Afterwards, Spike has an ominous line: I will know your blood, Slayer. (pause) I will make your neck my chalice ... and drink deep.

Then proceeds to fall in an open grave. Lolz.

We go to Buffy and Willow discussing class while walking down the hall. I like that we know Buffy is still in college, but we aren't there as much as last year. I'm glad that this season is heavily focused on her being the Slayer since we kind of wandered away from that last season.

At the Magic Shop, Xander and Giles are putting the final touches on carpentry while Anya rearranges the shelves. I have to include the next part or Sarah might stab me.
TARA: I just ... keep thinking how cool it would be, if we got a real psychic to sit up here and read fortunes and stuff.
WILLOW: You should do it.
TARA: Not me. But, but I'd love to, to watch and learn. From someone who's really good, you know?
WILLOW: You're really good. (holds out her hands) I'll prove it. Here, do me.
Tara nods and sits, putting down the cards, taking one of Willow's hands. Willow watches her study it.
TARA: Hmm.
WILLOW: What do you see?
TARA: Willow hand.

In the backroom, Riley is on crack apparently and wants to wrassle. Buffy just wants to look at the pretty training room that Giles and everyone designed for her.

To be a Slayer, you must score at least an 8.5 on the pommel horse!

Next, we have a silly moment, but it actually really applies to the situation. Spike is in front of the telly and he says to it "Oh Pacey, you blind idiot. Can't you see she doesn't love you?" For those not aware, Pacey is a character from Dawson's Creek who falls in love with his best friend's ex-girlfriend and drama ensues. But this is foreshadowing Spike's feelings towards Buffy and it's interesting too if you know who Pacey does end up with...

Not this guy.

Anywho, to get back on track. Harmony shows up because Buffy "won't give up until she's killed me to death!" No one cares to kill you because you are an idiot and need to just go away. Spike lets her stay in his crypt in exchange for sex. They're classy like that. He also wants something else from her (no, not that)- kill the Slayer.

The next morning in the Summer's kitchen, Dawn is apparently 7 years old digging through the cereal box for a prize. Joyce collapses after asking Dawn "Who are you?" Good question. Dawn calls 911 (at least she knows THIS much) and at the hospital Dawn is once again a small child and is playing with the doctor's stethoscope. Seriously, Harry Potter was fighting Voldemort in a cemetery at 14 and Dawn is freaking acting like a toddler. Boo. At least because of her childish antics, we discover that Riley really must be on crack because his heart is beating at 150 bpm. That's really fast and not good at all for a resting heartbeat. But Riley is big tough man and thinks that he can just walk it off and be fine.

Buffy wants to get in contact with the Initiative, so she picks up a phone and says that Riley needs help because apparently that's how phone taps works now. Riley is getting all sweaty playing basketball and Graham goes to hit on him tell him that he needs help. You cut a chip out of your heart with broken glass after being pumped full of drugs. Yeah Riley, you're just A- OK. So Riley goes all PCP crazy, beats everyone up, and runs away. The Scooby gang gather in order to form a search team for him. Buffy decides to screw question Spike.

Now, for fun times at Spike's crypt:
SPIKE: Okay, is it bigger than a breadbox?
HARMONY: (smiling) No. Four left.
SPIKE: So it's smaller than a breadbox.
HARMONY: (giggling) No! Only three!
SPIKE: (quietly annoyed) Harmony ... is it a sodding breadbox?
HARMONY: (clapping and laughing) Yes! Oh my god! Someone's blondie bear is a twenty-question genius!

Buffy tells Spike the situation with Riley and offers to pay him to help bring Riley to the doctor that will help him. Smart move there since now Spike and Harmony head directly to the doctor and force him to remove the chip from Spike's brain.

Tara and Willow are searching for Riley in the burnt down Sunnydale High School where he camped out before. Willow performs a powerful spell to create light in the dark building. We start to see how much Willow's powers have really grown and how it slightly concerns Tara here.

And now, the beginning of the end of Buffy/Riley:
BUFFY: What's happening to you?
RILEY: I go back ... let the government get whimsical with my innards again ... They could do anything that- Best-case scenario, they turn me into Joe Normal, just... (sighs) Just another guy.
BUFFY: And that's not enough for you?
RILEY: It's not enough for *you*.
BUFFY: Why would you say that?
RILEY: Come on. Your last boyfriend wasn't exactly a civilian.
BUFFY: So that's what this is about? You're going to die, all over some macho pissing contest.
RILEY: (shakes his head) It's not about him. It's about us. (Buffy shakes her head, not understanding) You're getting stronger every day, more powerful. I can't touch you. Every day, you're just ... a little further out of my reach.
BUFFY: You wanna touch me? (walks toward him) I'm right here. I'm not the one running away.
RILEY: Not yet.
BUFFY: So you have this all figured out? I'm bailing because you're not in the super club.
RILEY: (shrugs) It's human nature.
BUFFY: (angrily) Don't Psych 101 me. (Riley looks away) Not now. Not after everything that ... Nobody has ever known me the way you do. Nobody. (Riley doesn't look at her) I've opened up to you in ways that I've never opened up to ... God, you're just sitting back there thinking that none of this means anything to me.
RILEY: (still not looking at her) I never said that.
BUFFY: (teary-eyed) Because it obviously doesn't mean anything to you. Do you really think so little of me-
RILEY: Buffy.
BUFFY: No! No. Do you think that I spent the last year with you because you had super powers? If that's what I wanted, then I'd be dating Spike. [Don't count that out too soon, Buffy] (quietly) Riley, I need you. (He looks at her, looks apprehensive) I need you with me ... and I need you healthy. But if you wanna throw it all away because you don't trust me, then ... (firmly) then I'm still gonna make you go to that doctor.

Riley agrees to see the doctor and again says such a sweet line (seriously, how can people not love Riley)
RILEY: Loving you is the scariest thing I've ever done, Buffy. (Favorite Line)

AWWW.

Buffy and Riley discover Graham knocked unconcious and once they wake him up he informs them that Spike and Harmony kidnapped the doctor. Buffy takes Riley to go find them and rants about how she's going to kill Spike. Yeah, right. Then Spike rants about how he's going to kill Buffy. Let me repeat my "Yeah, right". The doctor pretends to remove the chip. Buffy/Riley vs. Harmony/Spike battle ensues and after Spike realizes the chip is still in plus Riley collapses because of his heart everyone goes their seperate ways.

As Spike and Harmony run off through the cemetery, Spike starts to realize a little bit more about how he feels about Buffy.
SPIKE: She follows me, you know, tracks me down. I'm her pet project. Drive Spike round the bend. Makes every day a fresh bout of torture...You don't understand. I can't get rid of her. She's everywhere. She's haunting me, Harmony! ... (quietly) This ... has got to end.

At the hospital, Riley is all patched up, but we can see that Riley really feels like Buffy is slipping away. Even Buffy quickly leaves his side in order to check on her mom (ever heard of a phone?). Now, Graham is trying to convince Riley to come back with him and rejoin their mission. We'll see where this leads...

And now, for what we've all been waiting for...

Cut to Spike's crypt. Spike is sleeping in his chair. Banging noises. Spike opens his eyes and gets up as the door flies open and Buffy walks in.
SPIKE: Should have known it's you. Been nearly six hours.
BUFFY: Well, it would've been less if I wasn't busy cleaning up your mess.
SPIKE: *My* mess? I just *borrowed* the doc. The mess is yours, Slayer. Yours and the boy's.
BUFFY: I'm done.
She takes a stake from her back pocket and walks toward Spike. He looks surprised.
BUFFY: Spike, you're a killer. And I shoulda done this *years* ago.
Spike looks her in the eye.
SPIKE: You know what? Do it. Bloody just do it.
BUFFY: What?
SPIKE: End ... my ... torment. Seeing you, every day, everywhere I go, every time I turn around. Take me ... out of a world ... that has you in it! (Yanks off his shirt and throws it aside) Just kill me!

Hi there, Mr. Yummy Abs

And then this happens:

BUFFY: (panting) Spike ... I want you.
SPIKE: (muffled against her neck) Buffy, I love you. God, I love you so much.

Too bad Spike suddenly awakes to realize it was all just a dream. Yet from his next line we know that while it was just he dream, he knows that the underlying emotions are still there.

Oh god, no. Please... no.

Well there you have it folks. I've been waiting for this moment since we started this blog. Spike is in love with Buffy (as much as a soulless vampire can be in love with someone). Yet, we've seen how much he loved Drusilla so at some level he must be capable of those kind of feelings. Even he knows that this is wrong from his reaction, but who we fall in love with is one of those things that you don't really get a choice about. Excited to see where it goes from here? I sure the hell am!

-Kali!